The Importance of Support #ITSNOTOK

Blue speech bubble logo. Red and white text reads: SEXUAL ABUSE AND SEXUAL VIOLENCE AWARENESS WEEK 2017. 6TH - 12TH FEBRUARY

For Sexual Abuse and Sexual Violence Awareness Week we are amplifying disabled survivors voices on our blog. This post is written by one of our founders, Alice, who is a disabled survivor.

Content note: this post is about the impact that lack of support has on disabled survivors.

“Often it isn’t the initiating trauma that creates seemingly insurmountable pain, but the lack of support after.” ― S. Kelley

This quote is one of my favourites because it reminds us just how important support is after experiencing abuse and sexual violence.

In my work at Disabled Survivors Unite I have heard a countless amount of testimonies from disabled survivors, and the theme that runs throughout them all is the devastating impact of being unsupported. It is also a theme that I have experienced throughout my life.

Many disabled people we hear from have not gotten the support they need, whether that be therapy or emergency accommodation, simply because it was not made accessible to them. In their time of need, they are turned away.

Others are forced to have inaccessible support which is harmful to their health and wellbeing. It is crucial that we recognise the detrimental effect this can have on a persons life.

Some disabled survivors speak out about what has happened to them, but their stories are ignored or dismissed because of their disability. Others are blamed for the abuse they have endured, or are told that their disability was the cause.

With government cuts affecting the vast majority of front line services, it can sometimes be hard to see hope for disabled survivors. Many services simply cannot afford to make adaptions to their buildings or redesign what they offer, they are already struggling to operate on their budgets.

But I do see hope, Disabled Survivors Unite are changing things. The services we consult with are keen to support disabled people, and we have shown them how they can be inclusive without the expense of having to renovate their building.

The message that we give to services is this – no matter what, welcome disabled survivors with open arms. Invite us to use your service, ask us what we need, make adjustments, provide alternatives, and help us to find somewhere that can support us if you cannot.

Being given the opportunity and ability to access support really is vital. It can help a victim become a survivor. And without it, we suffer.

If you would like to work with us to improve your service, please email: info@disabledsurvivorsunite.org.uk

If you are a disabled survivor who would like support, or help to find accessible support in your area, please click here.

#ITSNOTOK Disability Themed Twitter Q&A 

Blue speech bubble logo. Red and white text reads: SEXUAL ABUSE AND SEXUAL VIOLENCE AWARENESS WEEK 2017. 6TH - 12TH FEBRUARY

This Friday, the 10th of February, from 1-2pm GMT, Disabled Survivors Unite will be hosting a Twitter Q&A with Respond centred around disability for Sexual Abuse and Sexual Violence Awareness Week.

We welcome everyone to take part in this discussion! We are especially keen to hear from disabled survivors and disabled people.

However, we have purposefully phrased questions in such a way that means you do not have to disclose whether you are either disabled or a survivor when answering.

Disabled Survivors Unite are a user-led organisation (all founders are disabled) creating change for disabled survivors of abuse and sexual violence. You can find out more about our work here.

Respond is a service which provides support to children and adults with learning disabilities who have experienced abuse or trauma. You can find out more about their work here.

How our Twitter Q&A will work

Be sure to follow @DSUtweets and @RESPOND_UK on Twitter. All questions will be posted by the @DSUtweets Twitter account.

We will be using the #itsnotok hashtag for this discussion. However, please note that this hashtag is being used widely for Sexual Abuse and Sexual Violence Awareness Week, so other discussions might be taking place on it.

We will be tweeting ten questions over the hour, but please feel free to take your time answering these. All questions are available in advance below.

Format of Q&A

If you respond to a question such as Q1, your tweet should follow the format: “A1 [your message] #itsnotok”

In this case, Q1 stands for Question #1 and A1 stands for Answer #1.

The hashtag will allow us to see your responses, and the number means we know which question you are answering. However, if you find it easier, feel free to quote retweet with your answer.

If you might be overwhelmed by the volume of tweets and only want to see the chat’s questions so you can respond to them, check @DSUtweets account. Each question will tweeted about 6 minutes apart.

For an explanation of how to participate in a Twitter chat, please check out this useful example by Ruti Regan here.

Check out this captioned ASL explanation of how to participate in a chat by @behearddc by clicking here.

If you need any support during this discussion, or afterwards, please visit our website page on Getting Support here.

If you think posts may be triggering for you, please ‘mute’ the #itsnotok hashtag. This way you should not see the questions and answers. You can learn how to do this by clicking here.

Questions

Feel free to prepare your answers in advance, but please only post these once we have asked the questions on Friday.

Q1 Please introduce yourself however you feel comfortable! If you’re a service, please describe your work & reason for joining. #itsnotok

Q2 What services exist for disabled survivors? How can we create more specialised services? #itsnotok

Q3 How can existing support services become more accessible to disabled people? What changes would you like to see? #itsnotok

Q4 How do disabled people experience sexual abuse and sexual violence in different ways to non-disabled people? #itsnotok

Q5 What can schools do to educate disabled children about safe, appropriate sex and how to identify abuse? #itsnotok

Q6 How can therapy help disabled survivors who have experienced sexual abuse and violence? How could it be made more accessible? #itsnotok

Q7 What can the police do to better support disabled survivors? What changes are needed? #itsnotok

Q8 Does the criminal justice system put disabled survivors at a disadvantage? If so, how can we change this? #itsnotok

Q9 How important is it that disabled user led groups/survivors are involved in research surrounding abuse and sexual violence? #itsnotok

Q10 If you could say one thing to a disabled survivor, what would it be? We will collect these into a blog post for survivors to read. #itsnotok

We hope you can participate in our first #itsnotok disability themed Twitter discussion!

If you miss it, don’t worry! You’re free to answer the questions at any point!

We have tried to make this Q&A accessible a possible. However, can you think of anything that could make it more accessible? We welcome suggestions, please email these to us: info@disabledsurvivorsunite.org.uk

We want to say a special thank you to Alice Wong, founder of the Disability Visibility Project, for letting us use her wonderful #CripTheVote twitter discussion template. Be sure to follow Alice at @SFdirewolf and the Disability Visibility Project at @DisVisibility.

A Letter to Survivors #ITSNOTOK

Blue speech bubble logo. Red and white text reads: SEXUAL ABUSE AND SEXUAL VIOLENCE AWARENESS WEEK 2017. 6TH - 12TH FEBRUARY

For Sexual Abuse and Sexual Violence Awareness Week we are amplifying disabled survivors voices on our blog. This letter was sent to us anonymously.

“Dear Survivor,

Please know that what happened to you is not your fault.

I know myself how easy it can be to blame yourself or to blame your disability, but you have done nothing wrong and you have nothing to be ashamed of.

You matter. Your story is important. And you are not alone.”

Would you like to contribute to our blog as part of this campaign? Please click here to find out how.

If you have been affected by this post, or would like help to find accessible services in your area, please visit our support page by clicking here.

#ITSNOTOK Twitter Q&A

Blue speech bubble logo. Red and white text reads: SEXUAL ABUSE AND SEXUAL VIOLENCE AWARENESS WEEK 2017. 6TH - 12TH FEBRUARY

This Friday Disabled Survivors Unite and Respond are hosting a Twitter Q&A for Sexual Abuse and Sexual Violence Awareness Week.

We hope that this online event will start an important conversation about disabled survivors and how we can be best supported.

Questions will be asked from 1pm – 2pm on our Twitter account, but please feel free to join in at a time convenient to you.

We also welcome you to submit question suggestions for this discussion! Please send these to: info@disabledsurvivorsunite.org.uk

Respond are a service which supports children and adults with learning disabilities who have experienced abuse or trauma, and we’re thrilled to be working with them! To learn more about their work, please click here.

We hope to see you on Twitter at 1pm on Friday!

Disabled Voices Heard at European Parliament Hearing

Photo of Holly, guide dog Isla, Ashley, Bekki, and Alice. Stood in front of pink "EUROPE NEEDS FEMINISM" sign.

Content warning: This blog discusses domestic and sexual violence experienced by disabled people.

On January 31st, Disabled Survivors Unite spoke at the European Parliament about domestic violence experienced by disabled people. The event brought disability organisations, MEP’s and disabled people together to speak about the issues we face and what we can do to combat them.

Soraya Post, MEP and member of the Progressive Alliance of Socialists and Democrats organised the hearing. She said that domestic violence affected all people with disabilities and had gone “under the radar of lawmakers for too long.”

DSU spoke about our own personal experiences as well as sharing testimonies submitted to us by disabled survivors of abuse. Disabled people are prevented from coming forward when they experience abuse for multiple reasons. Some do not know that what they are experiencing is abuse, and others face structural barriers when trying to access services. As a result, we called for the UK government to reverse the cuts made to support services and disabled people directly. These have a significant impact on all disabled people, but especially survivors of abuse and violence.

Our testimonies were disturbingly echoed by others at the hearing. Ann Jönsson, who sits on the board of the European Blind Union, spoke about a deaf lady who was prevented from communicating by her husband who refused to interpret for her. She also shared the story of a blind teenager who was raped by a man pretending to be the taxi driver designated to pick her up from school. It was clear that disabled people across Europe are experiencing domestic and sexual violence, and not enough is being done to tackle it.

We hope that this hearing has sent a clear message to governments that they must do more to support disabled survivors of abuse and violence. It is imperative that they take this responsibility seriously, and we suggest three key changes they must make in order to do this.

You can download the transcription here.

Disabled Survivors Unite is Headed to the European Parliament

Disabled Survivors Unite is thrilled to announce we are speaking on the panel “Domestic Violence Against People with Disabilities” at the European Parliament. 

All four co-founders will be giving testimonies from disabled survivors, alongside TABÚ from Iceland and We Rise Again from Sweden. Our friend Eleanor Lisney from Sisters of Frida will also be speaking about structural barriers faced by victims of domestic violence. 

This hearing, which is hosted by MEP Soraya Post, hopes to raise awareness of domestic abuse against disabled people and put the issue on the political agenda.

This event will be taking place on the 31st of January in Brussels. 

Support Disabled Survivors Unite this #GivingTuesday

Today is #GivingTuesday and we would like to encourage people to support our cause in one of the following ways:

  • We appreciate all donations, no matter how small, to our GoFundME. We are a small voluntary-led organisation and are completely unfunded.
  • We are looking for people to donate their time to help us write grants to secure funding. Please see our blog post to find out more.
  • If you are a disabled survivor, you can share your story with us through our (re)Storytellers project. We use these stories to raise awareness of disabled survivors experiences.
  • You can also retweet us and share our message, the more people that hear about us the more change we can make!

Why not tweet the following to show your support for DSU

Thank you for all your support.

Anti-Bullying Week 2016: Power for Good

POWER FOR GOOD logo. The W in power is shaped like an arrow. #ANTIBULLYINGWEEK at bottom of image.

We’ve been celebrating Anti-Bullying week across the UK. Here at Disabled Survivors Unite we are committed to ensuring the voices of disabled survivors are heard.

I experienced bullying myself during a number of points in my life and know the affect it can have on a person. The thing I most want people to understand is that there is no shame in having experienced bullying. It is not your fault, no matter how people may make you feel that it is.

Bullying can be a form of institutional abuse, and I want to hear more people talking about this, and what we can do to stop it. Whether you are at school and a teacher does not take your concerns seriously, or you feel that your carers and personal assistants try to silence you please know that DSU are here, and we will always listen.

This years Anti-Bullying Week theme is “power for good”. I pledge as an individual, and as a co-founder of DSU to use my voice, and any positions of power I hold for good. A huge part of that is amplifying disabled voices to ensure that we are never silenced.

If you have experienced bullying, there are a number of organisations you can contact. DSU will support you as a disabled survivor, but you can also contact the following organisations:

  • Bullying UK supports those who have been bullied in a number of environments, including at school, at work and online.
  • The National Bullying Helpline is a voluntary run helpline that assists people who have experienced bullying of all descriptions. They are open between 9 AM and 5 PM Monday to Saturday and will take urgent calls out of hours. You can contact them by calling 0845 22 55 787 or 07734 701221
  • Childline has lots of advice on their website about what to do if you are bullied, and how to build your confidence after you have experienced bullying. Childline is a free service helping anyone in the UK under the age of 19. You can either phone, email or get support online.

If you would like to contact Disabled Survivors Unite please email us

We are recruiting grants writers!

Disabled Survivors Unite are looking for ambitious and enthusiastic disabled people to help us to write grants!

This role is voluntary, as is every position within the organisation. Work will be done remotely from home and hours are very flexible!

Job description;

You will have a key role in ensuring we secure funding to achieve change for disabled survivors of abuse and sexual violence.

You will have experience in writing bids for Trusts and Foundations, preparing proposals, or fundraising.

You will have the ability to handle confidential information and work as part of a team.

This opportunity is open to anyone living in the UK.

For more information or to request an application form please email: info@disabledsurvivorsunite.org.uk

Closing date: 28 February 2017

Disabled Survivors Unite on Going Back Giving Back

Photo of Holly and Aled Jones

Co-Founder Holly Scott-Gardner was featured on today’s episode of Going Back Giving Back. Here she writes about her experiences with the show and what it means for DSU.

I’m sat at a table talking about my life. It’s not an experience I’m especially used to. I can stand in front of an audience and speak about blindness and the importance of independence, but somehow this feels different. I admit that I was bullied, I know it’s not really an admission; not something I need to hide, but it has always felt like a secret I should keep hidden deep inside of me. This isn’t just a conversation between two people. I am being filmed for a television show that thousands will see. I am giving my life story to the world because I have a message that I want everyone to hear. Disabled Survivors Unite is here, and we want you to know about us. Filming for Going Back Giving Back was an incredible experience. I can’t thank Michael enough for the support he has shown Disabled Survivors Unite and I look forward to us working with him in the future. The support he is providing us really is essential and will enable us to expand our existing work. If you would like to watch the episode, you can find it on BBC iPlayer.